The Six Fundamentals of Habit Building — Part 1 of 6
“The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be.” — Ralph Waldo Emerson
Over the next six posts I’m going to break down 6 fundamentals that will help you master the art of habit building and start living your best life.
Ready? Let’s go!
When asked what she thought would be worse than having no sight, Hellen Keller replied “It would be infinitely worse to have perfect eyesight and no vision.”
Do you have a vision for your life?
The first key in creating habits that stick is to have a vision of where you want to go and who you want to become.
“Who you want to become?” you ask…
Yes.
Because every effective goal is more about becoming than achieving.
This is where SMART goals fall flat. It’s also why 90% of New Year’s resolutions fail.
Take this example:
When we set a resolution to lose 20 pounds in 90 days, it meets all the criteria of a SMART goal. But it lacks all the sticking power because even if we lose the 20 pounds, we immediately return to our old routine.
Sure, we lost 20 pounds, but we didn’t change our identity. Sooner than later we’re right back where we started.
Is it any wonder we’re discouraged?
If we really want to change our lives, we must be focused on more than the weight. We need to establish a new way of being — a new identity.
“Men are anxious to improve their circumstances, but are unwilling to improve themselves; they therefore remain bound.” -James Allen
Think of the last vacation you took.
Did you plan it first or did you simply jump in your car and start driving?
When it comes to vacations we all understand you must first have a destination in mind. Even the most freewheeling personalities are headed somewhere.
Consider this for a moment…
Every action you take is a vote for your future identity.
Like it or not, the things we do each day determine our identity.
There’s a bright side to this dilemma — identity is not permanent. We can change it. And it can happen almost overnight.
My friend and mentor Benjamin Hardy, PhD says “Your identity is what you’re most committed to.”
So what are you most committed to?
What does being committed actually mean?
I define commitment as consistent time, money and attention.
Actions speak louder than words — to be committed you must be consistently acting on/for the thing you are committed to.
Understanding how Identity and commitment are connected is key to building effective habits.
Trying to form habits without knowing the identity we want to create is like watering a garden with no seeds — we mostly get weeds.
This is all starting to feel philosophical.
Let me give you a couple real world examples of what I mean.
If I want to…
…run a marathon, I first must become a runner.
…publish a book, I first must become a writer.
…play a concert, I first must become a musician.
So the first fundamental in building effective habits is deciding where you want to go and the identity you’re creating in the process.
A habit should be watering the seed of your chosen identity every day. Or at least most days.
It’s time to start living your best life!
P.S. Like this idea? Check out our Magic Monday Newsletter for Habit Tips, Exciting Ideas and Reading Recommendations — Launch your week with 2–3 minutes of inspiration.
